Questioning Myself

Last summer on our way home from a family beach vacation, we stopped at a McDonald's in Asheville. As we were leaving, I was approached by a man who I caught checking out our license plate "county" before he began sharing a story of how he and his sister (he motioned toward a woman sitting in a van at the edge of the parking lot) had just come from Knoxville and about his recent financial and vehicle-related difficulties. Then he asked for money to buy food. I hurriedly loaded my family in our van as I, as politely as possible, refused to give the man any money. And then I heard the question I was dreading, "Why didn't you help the man buy some food, Daddy?" I answered as best I could but questioned myself as I always do in these situations.

Fast forward a couple of months. My family was shopping in a local Target. As we worked our way through the boys' clothing section, out of nowhere pops up a woman claiming to be deaf, flashing a card in my face, which in effect, asked for money as she could not verbally ask. I shook my head "no, no" and began to walk away. And again, I was asked, "What did she want Daddy?" and I tried to explain. I answered as best I could but questioned myself as I always do in these situations.

Moments later, we walked to Kroger next door and, sitting outside the front entrance, is a man who is propped into a wheelchair and who is breathing with the assistance of machines. He obviously had significant health issues and was collecting donations for the Muscular Dystrophy Association. I quickly reached in my pocket and handed Parker some money to place in the collection container. Why? Because the need was so obvious and I didn't have to question the validity of the cause.

Here's The Point: Some of the toughest moments for me as a parent have been ones like these when I've been instantly confronted with the opportunity to help a stranger or not. Moments requiring quick discernment and wisdom, knowing that an explanation for my actions will be quickly questioned. I hate that feeling I've had numerous times before when I felt I'd been "taken". But I also want to teach my sons to be givers, because Jesus loves people.

That's what makes causes like the Salvation Army and its holiday bellringing such a great opportunity for me as a Dad. I know the organization, the history and the destination of the monies being collected. And I'm able to teach my sons to be givers.

Just not every time in every situation. May God grant me wisdom in every situation.